Top 10 NBA Douchebags

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Since the quarterback douchebag list was a smash hit, I decided to roll out an NBA one.  Also, there are so many douchebags in sports that these lists basically make themselves.  The only criteria to get on this list is that I personally think they are a douche.  I’m sure we all have some guys in mind and feel free to let me know which ones I left off, but here is my top ten.

10. JJ Redick: His name sounds more like a Vin Diesel character than a real person and he is boys with Adam Morrison which doesn’t get him any points in the non-douche category.  He hasn’t personally ever affected my teams on the court, but he started out with a lot to prove since it seems everyone from Duke is a complete douche, minus Loul Deng, that dudes cool.

9. Andray Blatche: Most NBA fans probably don’t really know this douche, but after his recent bitching about how he shouldn’t be shooting the ball from 15 ft, that qualified him for a spot.  Look dude, it may not be your preferred scheme that Flip Saunders is running, but he isn’t forcing you to shoot and if I was getting paid millions to play basketball, not sure I would bring attention to the fact I can’t shoot.

8. Russel Westbrook: Many scouts say he is turning into a superstar, I’d say he has already turned into a super douche.  I’m a Thunder fan even.  Don’t bitch at KD, that gets your ass thrown out of town and I hope to god its thrown out of town to Boston for Rondo.

7. Tim Duncan: Let me make this clear first, I totally respect Duncan’s game.  If I was teaching fundamentals to 2nd graders I would show them film of Tim Duncan.  Also, if I wanted to cure somebody with insomnia I might lock them in a room and show them nothing but Tim Duncan highlights.  He may be a hall of famer, but my beef with Duncan goes way back and no basketball douche list is complete in my mind without Timmy.

6. Delonte West: It’s amazing this illiterate bastard isn’t locked up for life.  Now that professional basketball is being played in the USA again and not somewhere that would violate his probation, West can join back in, but what happens when they play the Raptors?

5. Joakim Noah: Proud owner of the ugliest jumper in the game and also doucheist hair.  His dad being a tennis-pro never really gave Joakim a chance to not be a douche.

4. Lamar Odom: This one saddens me, but he has to be here, purely on his choice of women.  Not only would you have your pick of chicks in general, but to pick a girl with two sisters that are just incredibly way more attractive is just beyond me.  Odom was one of my favorite and probably most underrated players of this last decade, but his wife is inexcusable.

3. Metta World Peace: Just when you thought Ron Artest couldn’t do anything more worthless than release a rap album, he went and changed his name.  Although I must admit, hearing the announcer say World Peace when he makes a shot is pretty funny.  It is slightly ironic that the guy who jumped into a crowd in Detroit and started throwing bows is now named World Peace.

2. Kris Humphries: At least he picked the hot one unlike Odom, but this guy has been a douche since birth.  He didn’t pick up an offer to Kansas because the guys after his visit told coach he was too big of douche to be on the team.

1. David Stern: I’m white and even I think this guy is a racist.  When he isn’t trying to get young black men to dress in ties, he is vetoing trades and just doing whatever the fuck he wants.  How much longer can this guy be the face of basketball?

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~ by kcuncensored on December 29, 2011.

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